Taylor Swift Just Increased Her Net Worth By $1

(CNN)After nearly four hours of deliberation, a jury ruled in favor of pop star Taylor Swift in her countersuit against former radio host David Mueller for alleged assault and battery. Swift accused Mueller of groping her at a meet-and-greet event in June 2013. He will be required to pay $1 in damages to Swift.

Taylor Swift just won a lawsuit against some DJ from Denver for sexual assault, but the real winner is the DJ. 

This dude inappropriately touched a female celebrity and his punishment was to hand over a fucking dollar bill???  And it wasn’t just some D-list celebrity.  It was Taylor Swift.  Talk about a slap on the wrist. 

In most cases, being found guilty of sexual assault and battery is a bad look.  Technically, this guy David Mueller is now a registered sex offender, but think about the fame he’s going to get for being the guy who grabbed Taylor Swift’s ass for a $1 fee.  You’re talking about a woman who is worth $280 million.  It should cost at least $1,000 to look at her in person, and $10,000 to shake her hand.

Instead, this fucking loser DJ from Denver who thought he was making power moves by grabbing T-Swift’s ass will now be set for life. He’ll end up writing a book about this whole saga and make a profit off of it.

Who knew $1 could get you a published book and one squeeze of Taylor Swift’s butt.  Some guys have all the luck.


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