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Middle Urinal Must Bets: NFL Week 2

GOOOOOOOD MORNING DEGENERATES! Happy NFL Sunday Thursday! One of our locks this week is in the Thursday night game, so the rest of the locks will be posted Sunday (or you can peep the pod to hear them for yourself).

ANYWHO, welcome to Middle Urinal Must Bets, presented by the WTP Sports Book (go DM @WTP_SportsBook on Twitter to place your bets). Each week on Live from the Middle Urinal—an OK-at-best podcast you certainly should(n’t) listen to—myself and fellow degenerate sports bettor Dom not only talk about our favorite bets for the following week, but we guess the lines, talk about the bad beats from the week before, and of course, give you our…

LOCKS OF THE WEEK

Last year, we started these suckers a little late and weren’t able to finish the season, but this year we’re in it for the long-haul. After going 4-0 (Matt) and 2-2 (Dom), now we’re committing to 16 weeks of pickin’ LOCKS for the boys. Get excited. This year, we’re also going to add in a consensus bonus pick, one that we both like.

And now, without further ado, here are our LOCKS OF THE WEEK for NFL Week 2.

Matt (1-0; lifetime, 5-0)
The Game: Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Carolina Panthers; Thursday, 8:20 pm
The Pick: CAR -6.5 (now -7)

Right now, this pick looks a little sketchy. Since I made the pick on the pod, the line has moved half a point in the wrong direction for someone wanting Carolina to cover, and 75% of the bets for 81% of the public money have been placed on Carolina, which is terrifying. If we know anything about gambling, you gotta fade the heavy public. However, there are about 6% more sharps betting on the Panthers. While that’s not a huge enough amount to immediately sway anyone, I think it’s enough for me to have that gut feeling. The Panthers are coming off a tough Week 1 loss to the Rams after a late almost comeback, and now they’re playing a terrible Bucs team at home. As long as Cam doesn’t turn the ball over, I promise you, Carolina will win this game by 10 points. (I don’t hate teasing this to -1, though, just saying. Gotta get out ahead of this one.)

Dom (0-1; lifetime, 2-3)
The Game: Chicago Bears at Denver Broncos; Sunday, 4:25 pm
The Pick: DEN +3 (now +2)

We love a home dog. We love them. If this was a prime time game, Dom would’ve told all of you to bet your mortgage on Denver to cover the spread. Vic Fangio knows how to take advantage of Mitch Trubisky’s weaknesses, and he’s 100% goin to. Plus, Denver is almost unstoppable at home in the first few weeks of the season. In fact, they’re 49-8-2 at home in the first 2 weeks of the season. Even with Joe Flacco under center, we love it.

BC (0-0; lifetime, 0-0)
The Game: New England Patriots at Miami Dolphins; Sunday, 1:00 pm
The Pick: NE -19 (now -19)

It’s an insane pick because it’s an insane amount of points, but Miami is a dumpster fire and Antonio Brown is playing today for the Patriots. There’s absolutely no chance the Patriots don’t win this game by 24. To quote BC, “put down your 2x4s because we’re laying the wood on the Pats.”

BONUS PICK
The Game: Indianapolis Colts at Tennessee Titans; Sunday, 1:00 pm
The Pick: IND -3 (now -3)

The Colts proved last week that they can still hang with Jacoby Brisset under center, and while Tennessee is definitely a team you can’t take too lightly, Indy is on a mission to prove it can still compete, and that’s all I need. Love a little fight in a team.

Every Sunday morning, I’ll be bringing you these picks, so make sure you place all your bets with the WTP Sports Book by DMing us at @WTP_SportsBook on Twitter. Go make some money, folks. And listen to the show on Wednesdays anywhere you can find podcasts!

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