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We need to have a discussion about this goddamn Peloton commercial…

In all my days of being a living, breathing human being, I have seen a fair deal of public outcry and vitriol for a number of stupid reasons. 

This may be one of the most united points of hatred in U.S. history. People can’t agree on gun control, if Nazi’s are bad people or not, what the best chicken sandwich is, a number of things. But what everyone can agree on is how much this Peloton commercial stinks. 

This ad started running a few weeks back and holy shit is it annoying. My dad has a minor stroke every time it comes on TV, screaming at the screen about how much he hates the women who’s using the Peloton, the fictional husband for giving it to her, and the company for running the commercial.  I thought that he and I were alone on this island of hatred for Peloton, but it turns out the entire internet hates it as well. Today, Peloton was trending on twitter. I went to investigate as angry beads of sweat ran down my face and, apparently, everyone took last nights Sunday Night Football game as a chance to shit ALL over Peloton.

What makes this particular Peloton commercial so bad is a myriad of things: The shit acting, the shitty scenario we’re supposed to believe is taking place, the choice of “She’s so high” for a goddamn stationary bike ad. But what really elevates this commercial into “Kars 4 Kids” territory is how goddamn persistent it is. You cannot turn on a television without seeing this garbage. It’s everywhere. It’s like the black plague. You literally cannot escape it.

Who watches this commercial and goes, “You know what? After seeing this 412 times this week, I really think Peloton is a great idea for a Christmas gift for my husband!” No one. No one has every said those words after seeing the Peloton commercial. Who wants to cough up $2300 for a fucking stationary bike?

Nothing about this makes sense. I hate everything, but i ESPECIALLY hate Peloton.


Photo via Peloton

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